Your Boyfriend Broke Up With You But Wants to Be Friends – How to Use Friendship to Get Him Back
Written on August 7, 2010 by Julia Woodard
What can you do when your boyfriend tells you he no longer wants a love relationship with you but wants to be friends? Your first thought is to tell him to get lost and maybe say a few other uncomplimentary things. But, if you want to get him back into a love relationship again, you will accept his offer to remain friends. It will not be easy to go from being his girlfriend to just friend, but it is in your best interests to do it. You may feel that you are giving up your dreams of a home and family with him, but that may not be the case. Being his trusted friend will be a very important part of his life and a stepping stone to becoming his girlfriend again. First of all you must make the adjustments in your mind. You will no longer be planning a future with him, but that may be only temporary. With most breakups, the man wants nothing to do with his ex girlfriend and you will have no contact with him. By being his friend you are still be able to talk to him and know what is going on in his life. Look at how you value your closest and trusted friend. This is what you will be to him. You might be surprised at how much more open and sharing of his personal feelings he will become. This will give you a chance to understand him better, and when you do get back together, you can still be his best and most trusted friend. The relationships that last the longest and remain the strongest are based on true friendship. Wanting to remain your friend will mean that he still has feelings for you and you can build on them to become his girlfriend again. You will have to guard against still thinking of yourself as his girlfriend and not try to be too involved in his life. Do not always be there for him, so that he takes you for granted. If he calls you about a problem, listen to him, but do not try to solve it. You do not want to be giving him advice because if it goes wrong it might make him blame you. Never bring up the past or pry into his dating status. If he does tell you about someone new he has met, choke down your tears and tell him you are happy for him and hope it will work out. The same applies when he tells you an affair has fallen apart. Do not act overjoyed and offer to come right over to console him. Just listen and do not take sides. Being a close and trusted friend to your ex boyfriend will sometimes tear you apart, but keep thinking of the day when he will realize how much you mean to his life and want you as his girlfriend again. This will take a lot of patience and strength, but if you love him it will be worth it.
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